A dear friend and mentor recently told me that there is a flaw some where in my foundation thus the reason I sought to fill my God shaped hole with everything but Him for so long and struggled with truly trusting Him with everything in my life. I used to pride myself that I would trust God to go over to India, that I would trust Him to provide for my every need while I was there. Yet as it is written in: Proverbs 16:18
Pride goes before destruction, and a haughty spirit before a fall.
I wasn’t intentionally walking with pride however it was there none the less. God has been trying to gently show me the many areas that I haven’t trusted him, with my time, with relationships, and with my body. When I got sick as a child some people came from the church that we were attending and prayed for me. I wasn’t instantly healed nor did I heal over time so their way of justifying the lack of healing was to tell a small child that she did not have enough faith. To have that crack in my foundation for so long left me struggling when others would ask me to lay hands on them and pray for healing or a specific thing they were struggling in their life. I would internally question my prayer and wonder how I could pray for healing for them and have the amount of faith necessary when I didn’t have the correct amount as a child. The awesome thing that I am learning is that this was a lie that I believed for way to long! It was a way that the devil could keep me bound and ineffective in a gifting that God has potentially given to me. If the devil can cause things in our lives that keeps us ineffective for a time he, in his mind, has won and if we allow him to keep us there because of bitterness and anger, he does win.
God has other plans for his children though! God wants to make you better not bitter! During this season in my life I am learning that God has already won the battle but it is time for me and his other children to get on the same page and declare our freedom, independence and triumph over the devil.
I recently saw a saying that said,
The devil knows your name but he calls you by your sin.
God knows your sin but He calls you by your name!
It is so true! So often we let the devil keep us paralyzed pointing out all of the things that we have done wrong in our lives even when we have turned our lives over to Jesus. Y’all the devil has already been disarmed! We just have to remember that and then in turn remind the devil when he comes at us!
In Colossians 2:13-15 it says:
13 And you, who were dead in your trespasses and the uncircumcision of your flesh,
God made alive together with him, having forgiven us all our trespasses,
14 by canceling the record of debt that stood against us with its legal demands.
This he set aside, nailing it to the cross.
15 He disarmed the rulers and authorities and put them to open shame,
by triumphing over them in him.
Because Jesus has already paid the price I can walk boldly into the presence of the Almighty God without any guilt, condemnation or expectation of punishment because of the cross, the price Jesus paid for my sins. Now I can have an intimacy with the all powerful, all knowing infinite creator of the whole universe.
I have lived my life too long in the past, constantly recalling the things that I have done, the things done to me and how that should separate me from this amazing God who sent His son for me while I was still walking in my own sin. Who am I to keep myself there when the God of the universe says that He remembers them no more!!
“Our God came, died a cruel death on the cross
and paid the full debt of sin with His own life
so that you and I can reign in life today!”
“Destined to Reign” by Joseph Prince
So what do you do when you have cracks in your foundation?
Do you apply the caulk of just self-help books and what others say you should or shouldn’t believe?
Or do you run to the word of God and to the foot of the cross?
I want to learn who I am in God through studying His word, spending time in His presence, worshiping my Savior for the work He has already finished. I want to rest easy knowing He has won the battle, I will stop depending on my self-efforts to make me “good enough” or worthy to be called His daughter”. I am already good enough and a worthy beloved heir to His throne. This knowledge sets me free to minister to others because I am not doing it for them or their approval, or even for God’s acceptance and approval.
” God’s grace does not make you lazy and unproductive. On the contrary, it makes you labor more abundantly for His glory. Apostle Paul, a preacher of God’s grace and the finished work of Jesus, said that he, “labored more abundantly than they all”. In the new covenant, God’s way is to bless you first, and the knowledge of His blessing gives you the power to labor more abundantly. In other words… we do not labor to BE BLESSED, but rather, we have the power to labor BECAUSE we are already blessed!”
Destined to Reign